in     by Mary Britton 14-09-2015
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Some personal benefits of training as a coach.

 

Some people train as a coach to consolidate their learning in leadership, management and the neuroscience of human behaviour and change. Others to consolidate their experience in practical coaching and lead them towards a qualification or credential. And some to shift themselves onto a new career – building on their technical know-how and management experience to seek new internal positions, or to launch a consulting business with coaching at its core.

Whatever the pathway into Coach Training many participants discover some unexpected bonuses along the way. One of these is their persona growth and the benefits which accrue to them as an individual, to their families and friends and to the whole way in which they view and operate in the world.

These are big claims. So let’s explore some examples, and consider how it is that coach training weaves these powerful changes into the lives of coach training participants.

  1. Parents.

Quote. “After months of misunderstandings, raised voices and upsets at home, I got home from Coach training last night and I listened to my teenager. It felt like the first time I had listened properly in a couple of years. I added nothing. I made no assumptions. I had no agenda. Wow! I heard her concerns. She understood that I was really listening. I felt as if we restored love and caring and a sense of being on the same side! Just in that one conversation.”

 

How does Coach training deliver that outcome?

The techniques of coaching include listening without judgement and listening without agenda. We offer each participant robust feedback when anything they say includes judgement or agenda. ‘Normal’ listening , usual management practice at most workplaces, includes making judgements and assessments as you go, and includes driving conversations from your individual agenda.

Our coach training includes powerful exercises which support your deep understanding of the effect on your own brain, and on your ability to listen fully to ANY other human being, of those judgements and assessments. We know you love your teenagers (and other kids), we know you want the best for them. And we know how easily ‘normal’ ways of communicating which encourage agendas and judgements build barriers between you and your kids which exacerbate the natural conflict of their needs for independence and your need to keep them safe ( for example. )

  1. Partners and families

Quote: “Day after day I give an enormous amount of energy out at work. I put myself in my client’s shoes and I offer the very best of myself for long hours. When I get home, I realise, I’m just looking to switch off, to relax, Reflecting on my deep communication skill set and ability has allowed me to reflect on who I want to be with my partner and family when I get home.

I want them to benefit from my best possible listening, and from my ability to see others as full of potential- all the time.

I realised after day three of Coaching Pacific’s Coach Training that I had been short changing my family and short changing myself. ”

 

Within our coach training every participant is encouraged to bring their own issues and concerns for some real coaching from the trainers and from their fellow participants. WE don’t believe in working with you on fake scenarios, or made up situations which do not have a bearing on your own work and life.

Coaching is all about getting the very best out of people. Learning and practicing the specific processes of coaching, as well as honing your own skills builds your capacity to identify, reflect on, and commit to action in your own professional and personal life.

You cannot separate the professional man or woman from the whole man or woman.

Reminding yourself what is most important to you offers big opportunity to identify, address and change the things which matter to you most.

  1. Problem people, including ex-partners, bosses and colleagues

Quote: “I realised that the only person who could change how things had been going with x was me! I’d been behaving as if they had to change, as if everything would be fine if only they would behave differently. I don’t know why really, because they’ve always been like that!

I reflected on how I’d been thinking about x. How I talked to myself about x. And I realised that I had lots and lots of habits of thinking not just about x but about quite a few other people too!

And I decided to try out my new skills on x. I listened without judgement, agenda or prejudice. I asked questions which followed from what x had said. And I used x’s own words.

It was amazing how differently the conversation went. And even more amazing how I listened, heard and understood x’s position when for years I had just been assuming x was wrong.”

 

During coach training, with Coaching Pacific, participants practice both deep listening and powerful speaking. They consider their own habits of thinking. They uncover some values and beliefs which may have been so deeply entrenched for them that they just seemed like the truth – rather than stories and decisions which they had each made up.

Offered many opportunities to reflect on these entrenched habits of thinking and feeling, and armed with real-time, real-life feedback about their own speaking and listening, participants often choose to tackle their most stubborn relationship hiccups, with stunning results.

Ex-husbands and ex-wives, difficult bosses and impossible colleagues or staff members all seem to change when these participants change their communication patterns, and when they raise their understanding and skill level.

Towards the end of their training they also learn enough about the neuroscience of human behaviour to understand how their own communication patterns and decisions have contributed to the difficult patterns of communication which show up at home and at work.

 

(The names of coach training participants have been changed to protect their privacy. Some of the examples offered are amalgam examples which distil the experiences of more than one individual.)

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